Saturday, September 07, 2013

What an oven looks like without cleaning for years.

For some reason, I kept forgetting to do this for the past few months. There's a total douchebag at work who plain doesn't care about anyone else and has no common decency. He puts his hour long teleconference calls on speakerphone, falls asleep at his desk and snores, and worst of all, stinks up the office.

The smell of a douchebag
No, it's not body odour. It's worse. At least body odour shouldn't be a miasmic toxin, as far as I know. What he does is run his toaster oven at least three times a week. It's usually four and up to five. Sometimes he makes multi-course meals. Regardless, whenever he runs his oven, the entire office stinks for the roughly 20 minutes it takes to cook his meal, and then 30-ish more minutes as the smell lingers around. Quite simply, it smells like burning.
The Oven
Why does it smell?
Knowing that the guy is a complete slob and the fact that it smells like something burning, I knew long ago that it was just because he didn't clean out his oven. I envisioned crumbs, some melted cheese at the bottom, and other small things.

Well, I decided very recently that it was time to see what was the big deal. Since I work late after 99% of the building has left, I walked over to his desk and inspected the infamous oven. Turns out that I was right and wrong.

Right in that all of the aforementioned items were found inside the oven. Wrong in that there was a lot of other stuff and more of the stuff I knew about. See for yourself.
The inside of the Oven
I only had my crappy old dumb-phone with me, so the pictures are very low quality. That and the lack of lighting. You can see all of the black chunks at the bottom of the oven, but you can't see the depth of each chunk. When I opened the oven, I found a few dozen "stalagmites" that were about a centimeter tall each.

Considering that the knob for the oven's timer has fallen off, my guess is that the douchebag has had this thing for years. And my guess is that he has never cleaned it out.

Why did no one say anything?
Probably because they didn't want any trouble. I mean, I have only been in this part of the office for a few months. The smell was there when I got there. I've been putting up with it for all those months and only very recently snitched because I couldn't take it anymore. Unfortunately, the douchebag and his section is being moved in a few weeks, so management and I agreed to let it go. Everyone else just took it up the ass for god knows how long...

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