Monday, April 28, 2014

Boredom of the Own and Getting Older

The older I get, the less I seem to spend. I don't know if it's correlation or causation. What I do know is that buying stuff just doesn't do it for me anymore.

Find oneself
It's probably a result of maturity, figuring myself out, and settling into my beliefs and quirks. This is probably how I came to the realization that I don't like wearing 90% of the stuff in my closet and I don't use most of the stuff I buy.

I hate my clothes
If you had talked to me two or three years ago, I'd have told you that it was incredibly important how you presented yourself to the world. This, of course, had to do with clothes. Fashion is one of the best communicators for an individual. It does not require proximity or acquaintanceship. Seeing a person's outfit in a picture from 500 miles away can have the same effect as seeing it in person from a foot away -- you'll miss the fine detailing though. With this in mind, I set out to acquire clothes that set me apart and spoke about "me". But what if I hated the clothes and rarely found an occasion to wear most of it?

That's what happened. I found out that I rarely had opportunities to wear the nicer clothes that I loved. Much of the other things I could wear, I hated. They didn't feel good or I didn't like the look. Things I initially liked turned sour over surprisingly short periods of time and ended up in the back of my closet. There is a very small selection of items that I actually enjoy wearing. I do not like to switch it up, and honestly, as time moves on, I care less and less what people think.

Why did I buy this thing?
I have asked this question about my clothing numerous times, but I'm going to focus on something else: toys. By "toys", I mean random gadgets, tools, food, drinks, or random items that I buy to entertain myself with.

Being a low key person with an overactive imagination and a low desire for change can be a problem. I often come up with ideas about buying random things to explore or enjoy. The thrill of the buy itself is also appealing. Just the rush that comes with wanting something, researching it to death, and making the decision to put money down.

Unfortunately, being low key, in my case, means being satisfied with very simple things, having low expectations, and not having too many needs or wants. The lack of self-restraint meant buying a bunch of toys that I would get bored with pretty quickly. Into the corner they went, one after the other, hundreds of dollars at a time.

There is a wasteland of toys that I'm sitting on and have gotten rid of at major discounts. They include a Playstation 3, a Blackberry Playbook, headphones, cameras, a bicycle, sewing machine, real toys, etc.

Learning to learn
At some point I came to the realization that I was not to be trusted with money. I found out that the stuff I bought wasn't making me happier and it was actually causing more stress than anything. Instead of buying things and regretting them, I've started to cut down on the buying. My expenditures on clothing are now almost non-existent. Only when things wear out do I bother to replace them. Toys are heavily scrutinized for how well they would likely fit in my lifestyle before being purchased.

It definitely doesn't mean that I've stopped though. There are still regrets, money down the train, and stuff accumulating in the corner. The process isn't foolproof and I may have even overcompensated lately. It's a recent development: bringing myself to buy even a new pair of pants or a cheapo tablet is met with scorn. Hope it works itself out.

<<< Thrill of the Buy

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